Baby Got Hack: Palin Busted for Trying to Hack Into Debate Moderator's Computer To Plant Questions About Alaska, Lipstick & "Things Obama Doesn't Understand"

News Type: Opinion — Sun Sep 28, 2008 3:34 PM EDT

The Empress Strikes Back

Still smarting from the "hacking" of her email account, Sarah Palin was busted by Newsvine's Weakly World News on Sunday for trying to hack into the email account of the moderator of the vice presidential debate to suggest questions, including a Jeopardy-like round on Alaska trivia and a race to see who can best put lipstick on pitbulls.

Unhappy with how badly she has done in interviews and how McCain did in his debate she decided to try to take matters into her hands, the same hands that can kill a moose in ten seconds flat.

While the hacking into Palin's Yahoo account could barely be called hacking since it just involved guessing her password, that work was too much for Palin who was unable to determine the password of the moderator's email account. Palin guessed the passwords might be "lipstick" or "Why I rock" or "girl power," hoping to capitalize on the moderator, Gwen Ifill, also being female.

Weakly World News has received a copy of the questions Palin was trying to add:

What is the Bush Doctrine?

What are five things Obama doesn't seem to understand?

What is the Bush doctrine?

What is most common predator found in Alaska (not counting television reporters)?

What is the most effective way to kill caribou?

How is a hockey mom different from a pitbull?

What is the Bush Doctrine?

The information was provided by a source who asked the his identity be kept secret but whose name rhymes with Podd Talin.

He says if he hears her recite the meaning of the Bush doctrine one more time he's going to stick that lipstick up her butt.

A spokesman for Biden's campaign said they were not worried about the questions that might be chosen but rather getting Biden to answer questions concisely. "By concisely we mean less than one hour per question," he clarified.

In other news, McCain's debate coach remains in a fetal position which is how he has been since last Friday's debate, crying out that ~~Janey~~ Cheney's got a gun and is going to kill him for how badly McCain did and because he knows too much about Cheney's gay lifestyle.

The Weakly World News, Newsvine's primiere satire publication, will continue to give you the latest gossip, er, Scott's mental delusions, er, news.

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Scott (Scoop) Butki's Column, All of Newsvine
Groups: Sarah Palin Watchdog, Satire @ Newsvine
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5.7

{"commentId":3188005,"authorDomain":"stevehouse"}

SteveHouse

In other news, McCain’s debate coach remains in a fetal position which is how he has been since last Friday’s debate, crying out that Cheney’s got a gun and is going to kill him for how badly McCain did and because

What the F? Why's it cut off there? Other than that, if I were this idea, I wouldn't let you sleep until you'd written it either.

{"commentId":3188005,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"stevehouse"}

3 votes

#1 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 3:47 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188034,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

Ha. Thanks, Steve. Finishing it up now.

That's a great compliment.

{"commentId":3188034,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

4 votes

#1.1 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 3:49 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188044,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) ButkiDeleted

{"commentId":3188015,"authorDomain":"insist09"}

insist09Deleted

{"commentId":3188178,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

insist, please post a link to your piece.

{"commentId":3188178,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#3 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:00 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188670,"authorDomain":"insist09"}

insist09Deleted

{"commentId":3190159,"authorDomain":"MinnieApolis"}

MinnieApolis

Yay, Brett, and thumbs up on his new job out East!

{"commentId":3190159,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"MinnieApolis"}

4 votes

#3.2 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 6:42 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188192,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

I had not planned on writing any more pieces until tomorrow’s memoir/slide show about my cruise last week but I listened to the Vinecast featuring Tyler right before going to sleep and the discussion about the hacking of Plain’s yahoo email account sparked something….

Because when I woke up Sunday morning the idea for this piece was in my head and my stubborn brain wouldn’t let me go back to sleep until I typed it up. Never did make it back to sleep going to church instead and then helping it plan its year of religious education.

Happy now, brain? What’s that? You think this piece is best read while singing “You’re so vain I bet you think this election is about you”? I’m not even sure what that means. Oh? You mean you think I should write a song like that for Sarah Palin? I don’t think so. Even I have some standards.

{"commentId":3188192,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

3 votes

#4 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:01 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188849,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

just added another line to the story namely:"He says if he hears her recite the meaning of the Bush doctrine one more time he's going to stick that lipstick up her butt."

And for those who don't know why I mention Bush doctrine 88 times it's because she didn't know what it was when asked about it in an interview, which might have been ok had she admitted it but instead she tried to act like she did. Rookie mistake.

{"commentId":3188849,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

3 votes

#4.1 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:53 PM EDT

{"commentId":3190555,"authorDomain":"JStranahan"}

Jimster

Good piece Scott-

Although I would add that when Sarah decided to perform some hacking she picked up a hatchet and a bone saw.

{"commentId":3190555,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"JStranahan"}

5 votes

#4.2 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 7:20 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188543,"authorDomain":"jspisme"}

jennyp

Very Funny Scott

{"commentId":3188543,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"jspisme"}

2 votes

#5 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:27 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188646,"authorDomain":"MinnieApolis"}

MinnieApolis

a race to see who can best put lipstick on pitbulls.

It may dismay/alarm you to know that some valuable reporting time was spent actually covering attempts to put lipstick on pigs in the days right after that quote. Possibly also some stories on putting lipstick on pitbulls and moose, too.
I know. There there. Don't cry now, Scottie. Journalism can still redeem itself.

Good if short take on the email hacking "crime of the century", ha ha.

{"commentId":3188646,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"MinnieApolis"}

4 votes

#6 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:35 PM EDT

{"commentId":3188710,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

dismay/alarm you to know that some valuable reporting time was spent actually covering attempts to put lipstick on pigs in the days right after that quote. Possibly also some stories on putting lipstick on pitbulls and moose, too.
I know. There there. Don't cry now, Scottie.Say it ain't so.

Sigh.

Journalism can still redeem itself.

Newspaper journalism maybe but I've given up on tv news (sorry MSNBC)

The part that cracks me up about the "hack" was that she used an obvious password.

{"commentId":3188710,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

3 votes

#6.1 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 4:41 PM EDT

{"commentId":3190643,"authorDomain":"pobox522rlyeh"}

Smiling Jack

What is the Bush Doctrine?

That's an unwise question for her to insert; Obama knows the answer, even if he doesn't agree with the doctrine. Think how great it would be if they asked everyone at the debate that question, and she still didn't know the answer.

{"commentId":3190643,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"pobox522rlyeh"}

4 votes

#7 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 7:28 PM EDT

{"commentId":3204071,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

... or if her answer sounded woefully scripted.

{"commentId":3204071,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

#7.1 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 1:58 PM EDT

{"commentId":3190975,"authorDomain":"nancysmith54"}

jlp coos

Scott:

This is great! So, why, Scoop, are you not on the staff of SNL or Late Night with Conan O'Brien or writing something similar to South Park?

If you need a cartoonist, just let me know.

Great tickle!

{"commentId":3190975,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"nancysmith54"}

3 votes

#8 - Sun Sep 28, 2008 7:57 PM EDT

{"commentId":3205885,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

Thanks, JLP. Glad you like it. I should send these two satire efforsts to this novelist I know w ho writes for Craig Ferguson

{"commentId":3205885,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

#8.1 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 2:54 PM EDT

{"commentId":3194334,"authorDomain":"DharmaGirl"}

Dharma Girl

Scoop:

I want to tell you that was REALLY unkind, but I was laughing too hard, and accidently voted for it.

The reason I couldn't just enjoy the humor is because I am afraid some people will miss the "Satire" label. I am very sorry, but...couldn't you have made it just a little...well...outlandish? :(

{"commentId":3194334,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"DharmaGirl"}

#9 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:30 AM EDT

{"commentId":3204106,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

Sorry it was too believeable. That's the sign of good satire imho.

Glad I made you laugh

{"commentId":3204106,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#9.1 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 1:59 PM EDT

{"commentId":3194526,"authorDomain":"adventurebooks"}

Robert Blevins - AB of Seattle

I have a new hobby. I research out where Sarah Palin will be a few days in advance. And then I find a TV or popular radio news site in that city that offers free blog space.

Then...I post up a combination article on that blog made up from the two Newsvine articles I created with cartoons about Sarah Palin. ('The Sarah Show' parts one and two)

I guess you could say I dog her around the country like the Flying Dutchman. Those cartoons have been posted to good response in Anchorage, Denver, other cities.

(insert evil laugh here)

{"commentId":3194526,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"adventurebooks"}

3 votes

#10 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 12:46 AM EDT

{"commentId":3205967,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

Post a link and I'll check it out, robert.

{"commentId":3205967,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#10.1 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 2:55 PM EDT

{"commentId":3194866,"authorDomain":"mark-liberal"}

Mark Liberal

I humbly invite fellow Newsvine humorists to look at some of my satirical screeds.

Once I mention it, does McCain and Palin remind you of Rocky and Bullwinkle?

{"commentId":3194866,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"mark-liberal"}

1 vote

#11 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 1:25 AM EDT

{"commentId":3195192,"authorDomain":"DharmaGirl"}

Dharma Girl

I am so doomed.

This is SO unfair, Mark Liberal.

I have tried SO HARD to take everyone seriously throughout this whole...well...cartoon show?

{"commentId":3195192,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"DharmaGirl"}

1 vote

#11.1 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 2:18 AM EDT

{"commentId":3206068,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

I decided if I take it too seriously i'd end up in a fetal position next to mccains's debate prep guy so i look at it through the prism of satire.

mark, post some links and i'll check them out.

{"commentId":3206068,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#11.2 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 2:58 PM EDT

{"commentId":3195694,"authorDomain":"nancysmith54"}

jlp coos

How about Mr Magoo and his dog? (nope, that doesn't fit. Mr Magoo is always looking on the bright side, doesn't get mad much.)

If they're rocky & bullwinkle, is it Putin and Natasha? Who's Natasha?

Beyond that, then who would be Mr Peabody? And where oh where is the way-back machine now?

I love cartoons.

{"commentId":3195694,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"nancysmith54"}

1 vote

#12 - Mon Sep 29, 2008 4:47 AM EDT

{"commentId":3222497,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

No reaction to the headline? I spent several minutes thinking about the

best headline and couldnt' choose between "the emperess strikes back"

and "baby got hack"

{"commentId":3222497,"threadId":"371496","contentId":"1925872","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#13 - Tue Sep 30, 2008 10:32 AM EDT

{"canLink":false,"threadId":"371496","isPrivate":false}

SCOTT (SCOOP) BUTKI

Backyard

Baby Got Hack: Palin Busted for Trying to Hack Into Debate Moderator's Computer To Plant Questions About Alaska, Lipstick & "Things Obama Doesn't Understand"

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