Shoplifter hopes store workers won't recognize her with neckbrace

News Type: Event — Seeded on Fri Aug 29, 2008 9:49 AM EDT

As you may have figured out I have a weakness for dumb crime stories like this lately - today's early leader for dumbest

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Scott (Scoop) Butki's Column, All of Newsvine
Groups: Bizarro World, IronyVine, Silly and Stupid, Weakly World News
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4.8

2.1

{"commentId":2633546,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

Meanwhile, back at JCPenney, employees going through their recovered merchandise noticed that Kirby had left her wallet inside the stolen handbag with her identification inside. These items were turned over to the police department.

A short time later, Kirby then called the store looking for her lost wallet and information. The store told her that she could find her belongings at the police department.

"Ms. Kirby called and wanted to know if anyone had found her wallet that she said had been stolen that day," Eaves said. "And for some reason she asked if anyone was in trouble for shoplifting."

{"commentId":2633546,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

3 votes

#1 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 9:49 AM EDT

{"commentId":2633747,"authorDomain":"bondibox"}

bondibox

Yeah, you never know when that leftover neck brace from the bogus whiplash lawsuit will come in handy.

{"commentId":2633747,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"bondibox"}

6 votes

#2 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 10:05 AM EDT

{"commentId":2633958,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

That's why I keep one lying around.:)

{"commentId":2633958,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

3 votes

#2.1 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 10:19 AM EDT

{"commentId":2633955,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

Oh but wait another dumb robber? Who'd a thunk?

{"commentId":2633955,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#3 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 10:19 AM EDT

{"commentId":2634170,"authorDomain":"JimmyJames75"}

Jimmy James

LOL what a dumb robber!

{"commentId":2634170,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"JimmyJames75"}

1 vote

#4 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 10:32 AM EDT

{"commentId":2634663,"authorDomain":"LOA"}

Lil Orphan AnnieDeleted

{"commentId":2637450,"authorDomain":"annoyed-373400"}

Annoyed-373400

Reminds me of the guy who called the cops when his marijuana plants were stolen. Brainiacs, all of em!

{"commentId":2637450,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"annoyed-373400"}

2 votes

#6 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 11:48 AM EDT

{"commentId":2638404,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

cops when his marijuana plants were stolen. Brainiacs

Ooh that's a definite keeper too.

BTW if you like these kind of stories check out this page - it's full of great weird stories like this. It has several worth seeding especially the skinny dipping one.

{"commentId":2638404,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#6.1 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 12:06 PM EDT

{"commentId":2638623,"authorDomain":"annoyed-373400"}

Annoyed-373400

Thanks scoop. I always enjoy stories like these.

{"commentId":2638623,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"annoyed-373400"}

2 votes

#6.2 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 12:11 PM EDT

{"commentId":2640944,"authorDomain":"JimmyJames75"}

Jimmy James

Or how about that Cop that dialed 9-1-1 because he thought him and his wife overdosed on marijuana. He had seized the pot and then they baked it into brownies and they ate them.

{"commentId":2640944,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"JimmyJames75"}

1 vote

#6.3 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 1:23 PM EDT

{"commentId":2642190,"authorDomain":"bondibox"}

bondibox

Or how about that Cop that dialed 9-1-1 because he thought him and his wife overdosed on marijuana.

That reminds me of a hilarious story ... about a friend who gave away some pot cookies. He made everyone promise that they'd start out with 1/4 cookie, and eat 1/2 at the most. He was rather adamant about people actually saying the words "I promise."

A couple hours later he got a phone call. "Hey ... man ... like, what would happen if someone - you know I'm just wondering here - just what would happen ... like ... if someone were to eat a whole cookie?"

{"commentId":2642190,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"bondibox"}

2 votes

#6.4 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 2:00 PM EDT

{"commentId":2642270,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

Oh that's great. I can tell a story like that but it might be best not to incriminate myself.

{"commentId":2642270,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#6.5 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 2:03 PM EDT

{"commentId":2638678,"authorDomain":"kidsarocker"}

mars chatterton

Only the dumbest get caught lol

{"commentId":2638678,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"kidsarocker"}

2 votes

#7 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 12:12 PM EDT

{"commentId":2644415,"authorDomain":"LOA"}

Lil Orphan AnnieDeleted

{"commentId":2648650,"authorDomain":"MinnieApolis"}

MinnieApolis

If there was an Olympics of Dumb, we would have some winners here.

{"commentId":2648650,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"MinnieApolis"}

2 votes

#8 - Fri Aug 29, 2008 6:36 PM EDT

{"commentId":2658856,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

I'm scared to imagine what would happen when they try to light the torch

{"commentId":2658856,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#8.1 - Sat Aug 30, 2008 12:05 PM EDT

{"commentId":2659863,"authorDomain":"kidsarocker"}

mars chatterton

I know what you mean Scott, just the other week I was watching a program on tv (caught on camera I think). In one clip a motorcyclist pulled up outside a shop and had what looked like a petrol bomb in his hand. However when he lit the thing and threw it at the shop window he lit himself as well in the process. He rode off up in flames..@!$%#ing hilarious.

{"commentId":2659863,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"kidsarocker"}

2 votes

#8.2 - Sat Aug 30, 2008 1:46 PM EDT

{"commentId":2662218,"authorDomain":"sbutki"}

Scott (Scoop) Butki

And they say evolution and survival of the fittest is just a theory!

{"commentId":2662218,"threadId":"343008","contentId":"1801005","authorDomain":"sbutki"}

1 vote

#8.3 - Sat Aug 30, 2008 6:16 PM EDT

{"canLink":false,"threadId":"343008","isPrivate":false}

SCOTT (SCOOP) BUTKI

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Shoplifter hopes store workers won't recognize her with neckbrace

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